Silence it’s one of the best ways a person could describe PTSD
But it is only silence for you, because it is not silence to me.
It is like having a loaded gun that is placed to the back of my head.
You never hear it, but in middle of the night it wakes me in my bed
No one else hears my agony, my heart goes thump, thump as my chest gets tight
And not a soul hears my cries, and I try to tell myself it’ll be all right
Some cheer and some stare at me but all see it on me like a face tattoo
There goes another U.S. veteran and now they wonder “what did I do”.
So, even the happy ones, look down or away, they don’t want to see me
Because they know in my pain they have a share, are part of my history.
Because for their right, had to fight, but at night, pray for light, as I am about to ignite and explode, from the stories untold.
And there is this war inside me on that battlefield it still rages
For “freedom” this is what I paid, my heart, soul, and mind these are the wages.
But I do not speak about these things I cannot at least never out loud
Though I wish I could say it, give it sound, just to tell the entire crowd
I wish I could just stand on a podium and share my entire heart
If all my silence I could just break, to give it a voice, that would be a start.
But I know in front of others the minute my very voice I should raise
They would strike me down and say that I am just crazy and that label stays
I wish that someone would try to understand what the silence is about
What if I did It? What if I raised my voice what if I did scream and shout?
Could they begin to hear, all my fear, see the tear, or would they jeer, as they Peer, into my soul, my voice to control.
So, I sit here in my silence and wonder if that is how it will end.
More veterans have died from suicide than war and that’s the truth my friend.
Still the news channels are silent, worried about some Movie Star I guess.
Stars can get more ratings than saving a vet, that’s how it works with the press.
It does not, and will not change that simple fact, that by this same time tomorrow
About 20 more of my brothers or sisters, GONE I fell that sorrow.
The real question for you, will you ignore the truth and all of this science?
Or will you stand up, speak up, interrupt, and help us to break the silence?
So, will it be you who sings into my heart the song that needs to be sang?
Or in the darkness, will the last sound that breaks my silence be Click, CLICK! (bang)